1. |
Southwest Virginia
01:59
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I keep losing my way in a particular town in southwest Virginia
The highway signs mislead me every time I pass through there
I’m gonna see you soon my dear, you missed me so much didn’t ya
But for now I’m smoking turkish royals in a Chick Fil A parking lot
And why don’t you just call me back
And why’s anxiety gotta be like that
And I don’t know what shit these feelings are gonna get me into next
I’m stupid and I’m worthless
At least I’m gorgeous when I’m shirtless
So I’ll make out with another stranger cause that’s what I seem to do best
I keep writing songs about shit that doesn’t matter
I keep losing my sense of self on a highway headed south
I think I’m getting better but I just end up much sadder
But for now it’s sweet tea and cigarettes in a Chick Fil A parking lot
I wanna get high as hell and scare myself into believing
That all my pain will flush away when I finally reach the grave
I wanna get so drunk that your face is all I’m seeing
But for now I’m slowly approaching the grave in a Chick Fil A parking lot
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2. |
Pizza Boi Blues
02:52
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I’m in a cursed apartment complex called watergate pointe
Smoking a Turkish Royal, after this there’s just one more
The buildings here are a nightmare for a driver
Delivering a pizza at midnight twenty-four
And I swear this shitty job will be the end of me
I haven’t made enough money
To take care of these bills
And I don’t think I will ever make enough
To compensate for my utter misery
But I’ll work till I can’t bear to be sober any longer
And I’ll smoke till i can’t stand my coughs like violent thunder
And I’ll drink till drinking feels like nothing anymore
And even then I’ll keep going down to the liquor store
A customer was really really nice
I stood outside my car, lit a cigarette and cried
This job is paying for me to get cancer
This job is gonna kill me in the end
This job ain’t paying me enough to make my anger worth it
So I’ll drive and drive and never see this rotten town again
But I’ll work till I can’t bear to be sober any longer
And I’ll smoke till I can’t stand my coughs like violent thunder
And I’ll drink till drinking feels like nothing anymore
And even then I’ll keep going down to the fuckin liquor store
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3. |
Bipolar Jam
02:45
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You ask me when I’m happiest, I'll tell ya
I know joy in all its luminescence
And I also know the darkest depths of human misery
And now I need the intoxication of convalescence
And my love is my bipolar’s surrogate mother
And my bipolar will make sure I never recover
And my recovery will make me laugh and make me shudder
And my laughter is as close to me as an estranged brother
ohohoh
I can’t tell when I’m getting better, can ya
Cause happiness is a slippery slope
I’ve lost myself again like a dying old best friend
And if I find myself alive I am sure that we will both elope
You don’t wanna know what i’ve been thinking
You can’t tell by looking where i stand
My mother doesn’t know how much I’ve been drinking
I’m in drowning in the truth tonight and there’s no sign of land
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4. |
Final Good Days
01:53
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And as the sun set over campus
We smoked bowls at the back of campus
I laughed at the clouds, I swear
Life’s not gonna get better than this
The cold air feels like velvet
So sweet I can almost smell it
And these are the days, my friends,
Before everything turns to shit
And cigarettes are cool when you’re young
And I’m gonna be young for years
And when you pray you’re looking for god
And when I do my lucky cigarette hears
Hail Satan anyway
And I can feel my insides rotting
I can feel my lungs a-black’nin’
I can feel the war my soul is waging
Against my body & mind
And I can feel myself a-leavin’
All the good things i was plannin'
Just for a moment of silence
Just one fucking moment of silence
And every day I hate you more
And every day I love you more than that
And every day I hate me more
And every day I love you more than that
Hail Satan anyway
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5. |
Audrey & Lambert
02:19
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I had a cat named Audrey
She was beautiful and fluffy
But she was getting older
And died one cold October
And skinny and with cancer
Mean and cruel, a dancer
And no matter what happens
I know I won’t forget her
And my dead cat Audrey
Looks like your new girl so godly
Skinnier than I will get
It seems like your whole life is set
And watching you move on I'm as sad as I can be
But hell I’m happy that you’re happier than me
I had a dog named lambert
Sad and fat and pampered
But she was gonna die
So we killed her in July
Smelly, slow with cancer
Never found an answer
And every day I think of her
And her nasty dirty matted fur
And my dead dog Lamby
She looked and acted like me
Fat and slow and so depressed
Nobody loved her the best
And watching you move on I’m as sad as I can be
But hell I’m happy that you’re happier than me
I had a love, we lay in bed
He looked me in the eyes and said
That we would be together
Forever and for ever
And he has been in all my dreams
Ever since I was eighteen
And no matter who else I see
You can't take him away from me
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6. |
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Dry lips to cigarette, cigarette to dry lips
If I knew the sun was exploding I’d want it to end like this
So many years I’ve been wandering round
Collecting new identities like a human lost and found
All around
All I can stomach are cigarettes and Pat the Bunny’s voice
Sometimes I try to eat but I don’t think I have a choice
And I daydream now and then that there’s no food, just folk
And I don’t have a body, I’m a disparate cloud of smoke
So I’ll run, run away to the desert
I’ll take the love inside my heart and lay it to rest
And I’ll drop it off the boat and into the Severn
And leave this shitshow town behind, you and all the rest
All the rest
Down in the desert there’s something big and wise
It eats away at sadness whenever someone cries
It chews away humidity, it devours the rain
The sky is clear and full of stars, it conquers all my pain
All my pain
And I hate little tensions like the one between you and me
Like the one between the clear sky and the wine-dark sea
And when I say your name there’s tension in there too
Such a little tension, how can I get to you?
So I’ll run, run away all the way to Santa Fe
My dad says I’ll be miserable anywhere I roam
But at least those little tensions will finally go away
And I’ll have peace and quiet, just me, all alone
all alone
My friend gave me a hug and I wept into her shoulder
I was born to be young and I was born to get older
And if I live past thirty I swear to god I will
Be playing all my music, I'll be in the desert still
I’ll be there still
Clamp my feet to the earth, clamp the earth to the sky
Clamp my heart shut with an unbreakable chain
Clamp my eyes shut so I don’t cry
I need a love so hard it gets clamped to my brain
So I’ll run, run away to the sage and the mountains
The dry air and the wild cows and the dusty sky
And I’ll breathe in the wind and I’ll bathe in the fountains
And love myself more than I did when I said goodbye
Said goodbye
And I only like you when I’m drunk and high and maybe that’s a reason to quit
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7. |
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I tried to hang myself because
I thought I deserved all of the
Punishment the world could ever offer
But I’ve stayed alive so long
Cause for so long I felt that
Death was a solace that
My high ass would never deserve
So here’s to you people love you more
Oh fucking nevermind
Oh fucking nevermind
Oh fucking nevermind
I am manic, oh wait, nevermind
For you I would stay alive
Oh fucking nevermind
Oh nevermind
And living’s a struggle
Except when it isn’t, yeah
I woke up this morning and
I wasn’t in a psychiatric institution
Would they put me in for madness
if I killed a man for a cigarette
But if they hanged me that’s a solace that
My high ass will never deserve
Until one day
I thought I’d go to NA
But I said fuck it and smoked a bowl instead
And then the next week
My lungs felt so weak
That I said FUCK IT I’LL GO TO NA OKAY
And here’s to you, the drugs love you more
Oh fucking nevermind
Oh fucking nevermind
Oh fucking nevermind
I am worthless, oh wait nevermind
I’ll stay alive for myself this time
and I really mean it this time
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8. |
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Well once upon a time when the earth was green
There came a band of punks so tough & mean
And they walked down the tracks, unheard, unseen
They took a bunch of metal from that desolate scene
And they dragged those scraps all down the tracks
Buried in a couple'a stolen knapsacks
They came out when the sky was black
Brought a crowbar in their pack
And those folk punk fools
You never can trust ‘em
Well those dirty folk punks spent time by the train
When the sky was clear or full of rain
And they fought all the way through the heat and pain
Cause the need to run drove them insane
One day these folk punks hopped the fence
And into the run-down stable they went
Where the cops who’re sent into the park
Keep their horses after dark
And these dumbass folk punks
They never saw the camera
One day the folk punks started to whine
They saw their face on a wanted sign
They had stolen from the stable & vandalized
Just a couple dumb kids with nowhere to hide
Eventually they got off clean
These folk punk kids so dirty & mean
These folk punk kids in the folk punk scene
Played at the Glass Menage, ran on nicotine
Talk about irresponsible
whoo-ee!
Love’s folk punk when it’s torn apart
Friends are folk punk when they’re not that smart
And books are folk punk when they’re written by Sartre
And I’m folk punk cause there’s mean in my heart
And blood’s folk punk when it’s on a guitar
Music’s folk punk when no one’s a star
My friends and I like to drive too far
In my fucked-up shitshow folk punk car
Driving way too fast
Follow the FedEx arrow
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9. |
The Madman
02:13
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God is the killer of all killers
Humans are the murderers of murderers
Life sends more to death than she brings into this world
And we, my friends, are the few surviving pillars, so
May everyone you fall in love with love you in return
And may happy times come upon you like a violent swarm and
May you know your beauty as if it is a fact
And may the wind always be at your back
Love is a death-defying action
And death is just as defiant of love
Kindness, understanding, empathy, and joy
Belong to us, my friends, more than satisfaction
Death ain’t something to be afraid of
Once it’s over all your pain will end
The world is constructed of anger, hate, and bigotry
And as for us, my friends, love is what we’re made of
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Jane Tragic Nashville, Tennessee
heartsick proletarian folk punk & alt-folk from nashville
instagram: @janetragic
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